Surf And Syrup

This past Saturday Boyfriend and I went surfing.

I'll clarify this.  Boyfriend has been surfing for 30 years.  In the 1970's he was a tow-headed surf punk – I've seen the pictures.  He's surfed up and down the California coast, and in Hawaii.  He judges the value of foreign places by the quality of their waves.  Many times I've had to gently correct him that London has no shoreline.

Anyway, he's a surfer.  That's established.  I am NOT a surfer – yet what do I do?  Inevitably, Boyfriend and I will walk into the sea, walking and walking, as if we were to disappear, I wearing the same expression of wariness and fear as the couple did who entered the empty waters of Amity Bay in 'Jaws'.  We rush beyond the aptly named 'impact zone', where the waves crack the glassy shore waters into a million ripples, and paddle far beyond, until the swells become gentle, awaiting their birth into full-grown waves.  I lay on the board, and when a likely swell makes itself known, Boyfriend gives me a push and I hold on as if Satan and his minions from the holiest of hells were biting at my heels.

If I stay on, there is a pleasant lifting feeling, as the crest of the wave lifts me towards the shore.  If the board 'pearls' – if the tip of the board takes a dive – there's nothing I can do, and submerged I become.  Here they be monsters, indeed.

I think what I'm doing is Assisted Body Surfing.  What I do know for sure, is that it usually scares me, is that wetsuits are not flattering, and that I oftten end up bruised and sore.  However, I always make Boyfriend very happy when I make the effort.  So that's why I do it. 

So Saturday, things go pretty much as expected.  I take six waves, and take a salty dip on four of them.  Fine – I have, after all, been avoiding this for over a year.  Then Boyfriend comes up with an idea.  An idea, which upon hearing it, I found terrifying, unsettling and wholely unnecessary:  what if we both went into the water – as usual – and went far, far beyond the waves, where the surface would be mild (and the water DEEP)?  And what if he left me there?

Then, on reaching the shore, he'd grab the camera and click off one or two pictures of me, bobbing on the water.  Alone.  Unaided.  Subject to the ocean's mischief.

Here is proof of how I am treated:

However.  Once the session was over, Boyfriend did charge through the water to rescue me.  And just as we were about to go in – we saw a sea lion, not four feet from me.  It no doubt wanted a closer look, having never seen such a diminutive whale before.  We could see its gleaming little body gliding through the green water.  We heart it snort, horse-like, as it came to the surface:  we witnessed a merging of zoology as a sea lion became a sea horse.

Now, after all this watery mayhem, came the real reason for these outings:  breakfast.  Close by the beach is a coffeeshop named The Pancake House.  And there's nothing 'International' about it, friends.  Sturdy stacks of pancakes, buckwheat or buttermilk.  Omelettes are cooked in souflee pans – they come to the table puffed with eggy pride.  And the coffee is strong – just the thing to wash the taste of the ocean out of your mouth.

Boyfriend always has the same thing, the Hawaiian Pancakes.  Well, this time, we were feeling a bit giddy, and thought it would be a fine thing to take a photo of his brakfast:

But I wasn't satisfied with it.  However, by the time I had decided to take another photo, it was too late:

And so we learned our lesson, that this is the tragedy of all breakfasts:  that in the hearts and appetites of humanity, they all end too soon. 

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25 responses to “Surf And Syrup

  1. wetsuits are not flattering
    true, perhaps, on many other frames – but not on yours. you look great (though none too thrilled) in that pic!
    you don't try to stand on the board? i know i could never do it (too much stomach in the way for me to manage that quick jump to put your feet between your hands) but I would still try it, every time. if i know i'm going to fail at something, i believe in failing BIG – and at least giving everyone else a good show!
    now i want pancakes, dang it.

  2. Dammit, Aubs, you manage to look incredibly gorgeous ALL the time. Even when you're in the middle of the ocean in an allegedly "non-flattering" wetsuit.
    I want pancakes too!

  3. I think you're very brave. I shopped your picture a little to show just how brave:
    http://pegoftilling.vox.com/library/post/what-lurks-beneath.html
    And I hope you had fabulous pancakes, too!

  4. Brilliant, Peg! And brave, brave Aubrey. I do not go out in deep water, no I do not.

  5. They must have been light and fluffy pancakes because you are still atop the board and not a "sunken treasure". The things we do for love. How nice to have proof of your bravery at least. Good show.

  6. OMG! A new movie with built in sequels. "Aubrey in Peril". Like the Perils of Pauline we have our own heroine. Our girl is more up to date and has a stylish bob and a figure to match. She is as smart as she is brave. Who shall we get to play Aubrey?

  7. aww! so brave and generous, indeed a heroine for the ages! incidentally, you are the second peep in less than 24 hours to blog about enjoying pancakes this weekend. aaaaiiighhh! now i'm hungry.

  8. The pancakes look (looked?) amazing! They make my poptart less satisfying πŸ˜‰
    And wow, what a brave soul! Deep ocean? No lifejacket? You are a far braver woman than I.

  9. Aubrey, I can't believe you saw a sealionhorse! I'm pretty sure it didn't think you were a small whale. It's just never seen anything so fabulous on top of one of those floatie-boardie things and had to get a closer look. Did you notice a camera or press card? I've heard aquatic paparazzi can be quite pushy.

  10. Beeg grins!!! I first saw you on Peg of Tilling's blog in mortal peril! This picture looks much more peaceful and balmy! Pshaw, you look GREAT in the wetsuit! And what FUN!!! (I would be freaked out by the depths below me, too) But the thrill! Ahhhh, it sounds great!And pancakes..oh they are a work of art, if even for a short time!

  11. Dude, i am so jealous. I really need to learn how to surf.

  12. Eeep! You are far braver and more willing to humor boyfriend than I would be. I hope you get some equally generous humoring from him on some form of torment that you enjoy.

  13. Girl in a wetsuit walks into a pancake house and orders eggs surffle' but the waitress says, "We don't surf your kind."
    Sorry.

  14. Wait, wait, no. Girl in a wetsuit walks into a pancake house and orders eggs surffle' but the waitress says, "Din'tcha see the sign? No shirt, no shoes, no surfice."OK bye bye.

  15. Oh, surely not bye bye for good, you'll re-surface soon enough.

  16. I don't know if this is quite the things we do for love, but it is what we do for pancakes.
    As IG hinted, I had butterscotch buttermilk pancakes in a cute little cafe in San Francisco last weekend. Yummers. I just had to put up with surfing male emotions but I came out of it high and dry.

  17. A wetsuit is flattering, it's the matching chapeau you wouldn't want to be caught dead in.

  18. BTW – Is this the picture I should use to show my favorite writer on today's Vox Hunt?
    You are a good sport to play along with Boyfriend. However, there could be worse things than floating about in the ocean on a sunny summer day in LA, frolicking with sea lions and then enjoying luscious pancakes.

  19. I agree with Amy, what a good sport you are to face your watery fears for the sake of companionship, Aubrey. It's worth bringing them out so you may then drown them in pancakes and slurple.

  20. We don't surf your kind… ah hahahhahaha… so fabulous!! πŸ™‚

  21. Aubrey! dahling.. you look Mahvelous… Peril suits you… and so does that wetsuit. You are my new style hero.
    I do like the suggested series of adventures – Perils of Aubrey. πŸ™‚

  22. A girl after my own heart…anything for a good meal.
    I saw Janet last night. I posted on my blog. Delightful!

  23. Early morning surf(watching) and a good breakfasty-breakfast are my favorite things ever.

  24. OMG Aubrey, You really are brave and awesome pictures. Hmmmm I want those pancakes.

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